Hey BABY! Let me whisper in your ear...

... if you even have ears yet. 

Little baby, I am SO GLAD that you've chosen to take residence in my body and ultimately, my world! Kirk and I are excited, and maybe a bit nervous, but more excited than anything to be your mommy and daddy. Clearly, we're of age to wear those titles (and then some) but for the most part, we've been living like free-spirited kids until now... taking action (and trips!) on a whim and flying by the seat of our pants. Basically, we never really have a plan for this 'adult' thing or even this marriage thing, but we always end up happy. So please excuse a few of our fumbles when you join us out here in the oxygen-breathing part of the world and just know that everything we do will be done to make sure that you are happy too!

This is you at 12 weeks!

After all, you are no fluke, and certainly no accident. My daddy, your grandpops, died just a couple weeks before you came into our lives. Everyone was heartbroken when he left.  I thought I was going to die from it. You will come to know just how close we are as a family, and why this hurt us the way it did.  But I was most worried about my mom... your grandma. After all, she was married to him for 41 years... which means she has been with him for more years of her life than she has been without him. I was worried about her heart, little baby. I'm sure the whole family was.

I thought your grandma would do well with some REALLY, really good news at a time like this! Who am I kidding... we ALL needed some good news! You sounded like good news to me. I asked your daddy if we could have a baby... he thought you sounded like good news too. 

We always knew we wanted a baby, but as to when? That, we were never 100% sure of. We've been married for 7 years, and at times it felt like we were sure... then one of us would flake out on the whole thing. Okay, it was me. Mama LOVES performing... more than almost anything else in the world. So a lot of that indecision had to do with my fears of losing the ability to do that. Daddy always respected my fears, and perhaps had a few of his own. So alas, we often went from "yes, NOW is the time!" To "um... maybe after this National Godspell Tour??" 

See how much fun I was having with no responsibilites!? 

But when your grandpa died, nothing became more important to me than the heart. And to my own surprise, much of my little heart belongs not just to my personal aspirations, but to my family - the one that I have and the one I was hoping to have one day. And now I know for sure that like you, my creativity will always be a part of me. It's been faithful to me my whole life, even when I actively tried to put it aside. And seeing as how you will be my ULTIMATE creation, I believe you are indeed part of my dream fulfilled.

So here you are! We took you all the way to Europe this summer and we didn't even know it! You spent much time under the Maltese sun, inside historic Roman architecture and ate LOTS of pizza and pasta. And maybe a little wine... sorry. I said I DIDN'T KNOW! :-)

Me & you... in Malta! (I didn't know you were there... but I knew my boobs were getting out of control!)

So far, you've been growing with me for 13 weeks... thank you for not causing mama too much 'morning sickness'. But wow, are you ever using a lot of mama's energy! I can barely complete the simplest of tasks without feeling like I ran a marathon or ingested an entire pack of Gravol!

But I don't want to complain... at least, not too much :-). If you're using all this energy to grow, than it must mean you are growing quite nicely. And it's good pracitise for me to know just how much I'll have to give in order for you to get what you need... both now, and forever!

I'm going to end this because it's time to feed us now. I fear that this blog may  become a "mommy blog" for a while... something I used to roll my eyes at! But I have a feeling there are a lot of things that are gonna feel normal to me that I used to cringe at before you came along. Like minivans. And suburbs. And leaving the house without makeup on. Well... I don't know about all that :-D.

Me and you... at 13 weeks :-)

Love you, baby. Now let's EAT!

Xox